Understand your relational patterns from the inside out
Individual relational therapy focuses on the patterns you bring into connection and how you attach, protect, withdraw, or reach for others. Together we explore your relational history, nervous system responses, and present-day challenges to build healthier, more secure ways of relating.
We offer sessions in Brunswick, Melbourne, and online throughout Australia and overseas.
Something feels like it isn’t working...
You keep attracting the same type of partners or repeating the same relationship patterns. You get jealous and clingy or you feel overwhelmed and need to pull away. You’re disconnected in your relationship with one foot already out the door or you’re currently single and unable to find and create the relationship you want or find the partner of your dreams.
There are so many reasons why you might need support: childhood family dynamics, old wounds and patterns, difficulties in relating, trust issues, doubt, and ambivalence, neurodivergent overwhelm, or issues that you feel unable to voice with your partner because it’s not safe or you won’t be understood and heard.
Much of what happens in our relationships is because of our nervous system and wiring and our conditioning, as well as our upbringing and previous relationships.
Unpacking and changing these patterns in a constructive way is the first step in making lasting, personal change. But it’s difficult to make change alone.
It helps to have tools and support and someone who can guide you through the process.
Relate better with individual relationship therapy
We all need someone who is impartial and who can listen. Someone who understands relationships, neurobiology, and attachment dynamics from the inside out and who can help you make sense of things and implement real change. It’s also valuable to be taught potent self-calming and relating tools that you can take away and use in your life and relationships.
We can help you transform, heal, and understand the deeper patterns that play out in your life and relationships. We can support you to build physical and emotional safety and develop personal resources from which you can access deep, loving trust and connection. Good relating is a skill that requires developing attention, insight, and emotional intelligence. When all these qualities are present, the depth of connection is boundless.
Relationship psychotherapy is not just for couples. You might be an individual in a relationship, or you might be single and would like to work on your relating and how you connect.
Our Specialties
- Attachment-based issues and repair
- Neurobiology of relationship safety
- Anxiety and stress
- Working with issues of safety and trust in relationships
- Healing from break ups, infidelity and betrayal
- Embodied relationship security
- Managing anxiety and overwhelm
- Chronic shame and guilt
- Conscious communication
- Sex and intimacy issues
- Porn use and its effects
- Neurodiversity and relationships
- Polyamory and consensual non-monogamy
What to expect
- An understanding of your own neurobiology and how it affects you and your relationships
- The capacity to regulate your nervous system and manage emotional overwhelm or flooding
- Deepened feelings of safety and security in your personal relationships
- Improved communication skills and emotional intelligence
- A means to process and integrate past traumas, and stop them overpowering your life and affecting your relationships
- The capacity to handle intense emotions such as anxiety, grief, shame, anger or guilt
- Heightened value, meaning and purpose in your life and your relationships
- A greater ability to relate from grounded, vulnerable and authentic parts of yourself
- Understanding of how to navigate the complexities of modern relationships
- An increased sense of self and self-worth
Fees
Individuals
90-minute initial assessment therapy session: $247.50
55-minute session: $165.00
Sessions
Ongoing individual sessions are 55 minutes in duration, plus 5 minutes of note-taking time.
Because we share rooms with several therapists, all sessions must start and finish at the scheduled time.
What makes us right for you?
We do not dish out a diagnoses and cookie-cutter advice on how to fix your life and relationships. Insight and healing are not found by following worksheets. Instead, they are found within, through accessing your internal resources and wisdom. Together, we work with your neurobiology, your nervous system and attachment style, which influences how you relate to others
We teach you foundational skills such as interroception and neuroception, respectively the ability to listen to and interpret your body’s internal cues of safety and activation, and to environmental and relational safety cues. We provide skills on mindfulness, self-soothing, communication and relational dynamics. We work from the ground up and the inside out, helping you to understand how your wiring and conditioning influence your life. We support you to heal and grow.
Your sessions are all about you. We always tailor our approach to meet you and your needs.
We genuinely listen to you and what you bring to your sessions,
Our feedback is that our approach feels collaborative, curious and non-judgmental.
What makes us different
Even though the focus is on you as the individual, we are systemic in our approach. That means we are trying to understand what is happening for you in your wider systems of relationship, family, community, and culture and find applicable solutions.
Our approach draws heavily from the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT), which works deeply with how our brains, bodies and neurobiology respond when under relational stress. We support you from the inside out, helping you de-escalate stress responses and the flight-or-fight reaction to co-create a safe environment for relating.
We also make use of regular feedback informed treatment (FIT) during and after sessions, in the form of short surveys and assessment. Rather than relying solely on clinical judgment, feedback informed treatment ensures that your therapy stays on track and addresses any therapeutic drift before it happens.
Research shows that the use of FIT increases the likelihood of positive therapy outcomes by a factor of 2.5.
Download your free 14-page co-regulation guide
Download our free guide, 9 Relationship Practices to Stay Connected and Regulated, and discover simple, practical tools to improve connection, deepen emotional intimacy, and bring more calmness and presence into your relationship.
Frequently asked questions
If you’re considering therapy, you might have some questions about the process and what to expect. These questions might apply more generally and not just to working with us.
Below are some of the more frequently asked questions we get asked regarding psychotherapy.
Click on the question to expand the answer.
If you cannot find your question below, you might also like to contact us directly.
What happens in a session?
Everyone is different, so sessions will vary upon the presenting issues.
The first session involves a detailed assessment of your history and a discussion of goals and problems.
Ongoing sessions may involve a combination of talking, listening and education, games, exercises, trying out tools and techniques, and building emotional and nervous system capacity.
Sessions require your energy and commitment. We can provide tools and guidance, but we can’t do the work for you.
How often will I need to attend?
If there is too much of a gap between sessions, progress can be slow or minimal. On the other hand, having sessions too frequently can lead to burn-out.
If you are currently in a crisis, we would want to see you more frequently, possibly weekly, and not longer than fortnightly. Research on therapy also suggests that change occurs faster and lasts longer if sessions are stacked at the beginning.
For that reason, when we first work together and depending upon your needs, we generally suggest meeting weekly for 6-8 sessions, so that we can build rapport and develop momentum.
If more sessions are required, we will usually meet fortnightly or monthly depending upon your needs and circumstances.
How many sessions will I need?
It depends. Some people prefer to come to resolve a specific issue and are happy to go on with their lives. Others come for medium- to long-term therapy, which allows time and space to explore themselves and their relationships in greater depth.
During our initial session, we will discuss your goals and expectations and determine what suits you best.
How long will it take to see change?
Everyone is different and arrives with different needs. Some come to therapy looking for new tools or to move past a situation, while others come to resolve deep and long-standing wounds.
We are committed to working with you as efficiently as possible. We will discuss the duration and frequency of therapy in the first session. Using feedback informed treatment, we ensure that we stay on track at all times, so that your investment in your relationship is valued.
How do I know you're the right therapist for me?
Therapy depends on the strength of the relationship between you and your therapist. Research suggests that it accounts for about 40% of outcomes in therapy. For that reason, it’s essential to work with someone you feel like you click with.
We recommend reading our About Us pages to get a sense of us and how we work.
You can also book in a free 20-minute phone consultation, so we can discuss your needs and how we might be able to help.
Likewise, if we don’t feel that we are a good fit, we can refer you to another therapist who might be better suited.
Take the First Step Towards Change
Healthy relationships are not about perfection. They are built through safety, understanding, communication and repair. Therapy can help you better understand yourself, your nervous system and the patterns that shape the way you connect with others.
Whether you’re seeking support individually or within your relationships, we offer a warm, non-judgemental space for growth, healing and deeper connection.
